A Simple Formula For Changing Our Behavior
Identify the problem. State what needs to happen. Offer to help. Simple, right? If we want to learn, we need to tolerate the feeling of inauthenticity long enough to integrate the new way of being. Long enough for the new way of being to feel natural.
Is There An Upside To Having No Social Life?
For one month, Madeleine Dore declined all in-person activities with friends to see if it would make her more productive – with surprising results. The trick to being successful could, in fact, be simple.
Religion Is About Emotion Regulation, And It’s Very Good At It
Sigmund Freud argued that we humans are naturally awful creatures – aggressive, narcissistic wolves. We have the civilizing influence of religion to steer us toward charity, compassion and cooperation by a system of carrots and sticks, otherwise known as heaven and hell.
‘This Is Small Talk Purgatory’: What Tinder Taught Me About Love
I found myself single in a town where the non-student population is 1,236 people. I briefly considered flirting with the cute local bartender, the cute local mailman. For the first time in my life, I decided to date online. But finding someone fully and messily human was harder than I thought.
Millennials Don’t Stand A Chance
Millennials entered the workforce during the worst downturn since the Great Depression. They are now entering their peak earning years in the midst of an economic cataclysm more severe than the Great Recession. They will be the first generation in modern American history to end up poorer than their parents.
The Art Of Losing Friends And Alienating People
Our culture long ago made peace with the fragility of matrimony, but we still have high expectations for friendships. If you really care about someone, you should be able to pick up where you left off, no matter how long it’s been. Friendship’s something you don’t really lose, right?
The McMansion As Harbinger Of The American Apocalypse
Increasing interest rates, inflation, and supply chain disruptions notwithstanding, the McMansion is alive and well. Far from being a boomtime fad, it has become a durable emblem of our American way of life.
Parents: Let Your Kids Fail. You’ll Be Doing Them A Favor
We seem to be more worried about raising happy children than competent or autonomous ones. Middle-school students wilted in the face of challenge. They didn’t love learning like they used to. Parents took bad grades personally. Everyone was unhappy.
The Great Wall Street Housing Grab
Wall Street’s latest real estate grab has ballooned to roughly $60 billion, representing hundreds of thousands of properties. In some communities, it has fundamentally altered housing ecosystems in ways we’re only now beginning to understand, fueling a housing recovery without a homeowner recovery.
Is Poverty Necessary?
Progress is dynamic, self-generating, unpredictable. Poverty is static, effectively resourceless, subject to interests that are not its own, therefore valuable to those interests.
Tapping Into The Power Of Humble Narcissism
The two qualities sound like opposites, but they can go hand in hand. Narcissists believe they’re special and superior; humble leaders know they’re fallible and flawed. Humble narcissists bring the best of both worlds: they have bold visions, but they’re also willing to acknowledge their weaknesses and learn from their mistakes.
Need Help With Your Dating Profile? These ‘Doctors’ Are In
Meet the consultants who help clients find love online — and, sometimes, assume their identities to chat with potential matches. Through one-on-one sessions and monthly retainers, Steve Dean helps clients reach their romantic goals, dispensing what is often brutally honest advice.
The Secret Life Of A Professional Statue
For several years in my 20s, off and on, I was a professional statue. Statue was both a noun and a verb. I was a statue; statuing was what I did. My job was, basically, not to react. Unless one of the tourists gave me what I wanted — a tip in the plastic lemonade pitcher at my feet — I gave them nothing.
A Parallel Neighborhood Of Unhoused People Has Grown Up Around The Existing Community
In Koreatown, the homeless live on sidewalks, in alleyways, parks—and anyplace else they can find. Dilapidated tents bound together with rope create strange formations amid the city’s mix of modern and Art Deco architecture. They awkwardly jut from the sidewalks like poorly crafted spaceships.
The Dark Side Of Charisma
Charisma is a force that can rally people during difficult times, but it can also blind people and lead them to accept unwise actions, policies or conditions. And when it comes to leadership, political and professional, charisma matters more than we’d probably like to admit.
Children of Scientology: Life After Growing Up In An Alleged Cult
For many raised in the church, escape presents a singular problem. “They have an identity to go back to,” says one former Scientologist. “We’re trying to discover our identity in a vacuum.”
Why Do We Even Listen To New Music?
Listening to new music is hard. Not hard compared to going to space or war, but hard compared to listening to music we already know. Our brains reward us for seeking out what we already know. So why should we reach to listen to something we don’t?
“Missed Call”, How Do You Reconnect?
How do you reconnect with a father who’s been gone for most of your life… what do you say, what do you write? ‘Missed Call’ explores the relationship between the filmmaker and her teenage son as they work out how to reconnect with his father who’s been absent for a decade. A BAFTA Winning Documentary.
The Lost Art Of Concentration: Being Distracted In A Digital World
We check our phones every 12 minutes, often just after waking up. Always-on behaviour is harmful to long-term mental health, and we need to learn to the hit the pause button. Experts are telling us that these interruptions and distractions have eroded our ability to concentrate.
I Lost My Life To Airbnb
I had been living in Rome but moved to Chicago five years ago. Obsessively renting out my home was the only way I could make it in the gig economy. When I found myself sleeping on the subway, I realized I’d gone too far.
How Silicon Valley Ruined Work Culture
More and more offices are adopting the work culture invented by the technology upstarts. These are not the offices where your grandparents worked, clocking out at 5 sharp, eyeballing the corner office. There is no corner office here—just “hot desks” and open floor plans, wide as the prairie.